Sometimes

By David Marcus Karp

Sometimes, when I’m sitting alone

I feel safest, and I feel happy

Knowing that I’m content with my life

Music plays, people live, and the air is bittersweet

But sometimes, I feel paranoid

Like they all look at me and even sometimes see nothing there

Sometimes I feel the eyes

And they make me shiver endlessly, and I see my breath in the coldness of myself

Why? Because I don’t care

Sometimes I realize that I’m not perfect

And the perfectionist in me becomes a little white lie

Sometimes the loneliness stares me in the eyes

And stands between everything I stand for

I find in me both a paradise and a paradox

And the reality gets harder to the touch

But that’s the price you pay

When you want nothing but the truth everyday

You take whatever’s in stock

Happy, sad, good, bad

As long as it’s not a lie, as long as it makes you feel something

That’s the way I live

Sometimes I feel happy, sometimes I feel sad

Sometimes I feel lonely, sometimes I feel content

No matter which “sometimes” it is

I always feel alive.